What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Can anyone or anything overthrow your belief in the Jewish God?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Why cant I ever fall asleep with my boyfriend?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Musk's DOGE workers are now investigating Medicare and Medicaid. They want to eliminate fraud, but can they also be hurting poor Americans and senior citizens' benefits?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

What was the worst decision you ever did?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Were any US Generals hurt or killed yesterday in Damascus, Syria, yesterday 5/9/24?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

What was the worst spanking you got growing up?

TEXT:

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

What is your language's pangram?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

What is your review of X-Men '97 season 1?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Is it true that most women like alpha males?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Why did the American's mulberry harbor not hold up after D-Day?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.